What Love is.....

Love is Patient

Little things inevitably happen in our lives and in our homes. Misunderstanding and conflict come to every home. During such moments, we get angry and impatient. We tend to blame: Why should I accept the slight? Why should I bear the injury? Who can endure the accusation? Why must I suffer the hurt and tantrum? But, for family relationship to flourish we need patience to humbly resolve the conflict. And, patience means accepting, bearing, enduring, suffering the slights, shortcomings, blame, accusation, tantrums, injuries and hurts. More importantly, patience also means a conscious effort to take the time to work towards allowing, accommodating and accepting each other’s differences in ideas, values, personalities and mannerisms. So how do we cultivate this very first and foremost definition of love by St Paul? In order to be able to develop this Christian patience of love we have to learn to forgive readily and endlessly. As Mother Teresa said, “if we really want to love, we must learn to forgive before anything else.” (One heart full of love, 113) “We must make our homes centers of compassion and forgive endlessly.” (“A Gift for God”, 18) St Paul says, “Be tolerant with one another and forgive one another whenever any one of you has a complaint against someone else.”(Colossians 3:13)
 
Love is Kind

Am I kind to others? Am I kind to the harassed check-out cashier who makes mistakes in my bill at the supermarket? Am I kind to myself? Can I be kind to someone who keeps interrupting me when I am at the computer doing something I want completed? Am I gentle to displeasing people? Am I tender-hearted or is my heart hard like stone? Do I have to wound with words of retaliation instead of being kind? When I am insulted do I answer back with kind words? St Paul says that, “when we are insulted, we answer back with kind words.” (1 Corinthians 4:13 TEV) Since all Christians are challenged to be kind to people, how do we show kindness? Kindness shows itself by being compassionate, generous, gracious and friendly.
        A kind word uplifts the down-hearted and the discouraged. A kind word is often sufficient to make a sad person smile. A kind person strives to make others happy. He seeks to ease another person’s pain or to soothe another person’s anxieties, fears or anger. He extends to others the glad hand of friendship. He shares their concerns and their sufferings. He listens patiently. Kindness is goodwill towards others. So do I hasten to search out his virtues whenever I happen to see his faults?  Remember, there is no happiness like that of a person whose heart is filled with goodwill towards others.
A kind heart is a generous heart. A kind hearted person is generous with his time, money, advice and knowledge. His generosity is kind:

• when he does it sensitively---done with great consideration for the dignity and the feelings of the recipient.
• when he does it unselfishly--done not to seek publicity, praise or rewards in return 
• when he does it delicately---done privately and not to be seen by others

         St Paul reminds us that, “Whoever shares with others should do it generously; whoever has authority should work hard; whoever shows kindness to others should do it cheerfully.” (Romans 12:8 TEV)
One thing a kind person must avoid is to hurt others with his criticism and sick jokes. We should never be afraid to be kind as kindness will do us no harm, brings us no bitterness and cause us no regrets.